Cheap Coyote Tricks      by Greg Keeler         Page 17             

 
The Importance of Being Ernest

Fox was scuba diving
in the Florida Keys when
he surfaced by a white beach
and saw a group of young writers
dressing, acting and talking
like Ernest Hemingway.
"Is this a production of
The Importance of Being Ernest ?"
asked Fox, inwardly congratulating
himself for the wit of his little pun.
But his smugness faded quickly
as they all unsheathed elephant guns
and blew his scuba tank into
dime-sized fragments.
Dogpaddling to shore, Fox decided
that perhaps literary criticism
was not his forte.

  
Bird Bigot

Crow bought a brand
new riding mower, for
he had a very large lawn.
As he was bouncing along
in high gear, he saw a
small blue egg with
gold spots lying directly
before him. "Oh no,"
said Crow as he tried
to stop, but it was
too late. He looked back
in his freshly clipped path,
and instead of a mangled egg,
he saw a beautiful white dove
with green eyes and a wreath
of lawn clippings in its beak.
"I've created PEACE!" 
said Crow, leaping from
the mower to shake hands.
But the dove turned its back
and said "The law might force
me to live in the same 
neighborhood with you,
but I sure as hell don't
have to shake your hand."
 

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