Cheap Coyote Tricks      by Greg Keeler         Page 24                

 
Ham Sports Car

With the deftness
of a European craftsman,
Coyote carved a ham
into the shape of an
expensive sports car.
Coyote climbed into the
ham and took it for a spin.
The purr of the engine
and the hum of the wheels
on the road made Coyote
forget that he was riding
in a ham--that is, until
a highway patrolman came
flashing up behind him.
"Where's the fire?"
said the highway patrolman.
"No problem, officer,"
said Coyote.
"It's precooked."

  
The Sun's Lesson

Coyote looked at
the sun and asked,
"What am I?"
After a few minutes
the sun answered,
"You're blind."


Interesting Gnat Ennui

Little gnats danced
in the air before 
Coyote's face. Some
of them kept crashing
into each other.
These were the ones
that Coyote found 
particularly interesting.
They, however,
did not find Coyote
particularly interesting.
Coyote's How-To Book

Coyote heard the expression 
"contented cows" so much
that he decided to watch
one for a few weeks to see
what it did. At the end of
his research, Coyote wrote
a self-help book inspired by
his findings called
Moo Eat and Poop.
It sold big.

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