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The Tennis Shoe of Guilt
Coyote and Crow peered
into the darkness of a
hole where they were
ice fishing and conjectured
as to its significance.
It reminds me of the
subconscious," said Crow.
Imagine the luminous
secrets hidden beneath.
"Nah," said Coyote, "You've
got it all wrong. Everything
down there is dumb and
obvious--dirt, rock, bugs,
fish, trash, etc." Just then
Crow hooked something
heavy and started reeling
it up. "Well," said Crow,
"I guess this should settle
the question." At the end
of Crow's line was an old
tennis shoe. "See," said
Coyote. "What did I tell you?"
At that moment, Sigmund Freud
stuck his dripping head up
through the hole, looked at
the tennis shoe and blubbered,
"Mother! Mother! Forgive me!"
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Oblivion's Teeter-Totter
"Tell me, Coyote," said Buddha
as his end of the teeter-totter
went down and Coyote's went
up," what is the sound of one
hand clapping?" Coyote
contemplated this as his end
of the teeter-totter went down
and Buddha's went up; then a
look of revelation came over
his face, and he leapt from
his end of the teeter-totter.
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H. Ross Pig
By dabbling in real estate,
oil exploration, and computer
research, Pig had become
quite wealthy and considered
himself an embodiment of
the American dream. On the
other hand, Coyote hadn't
dabbled in much of anything
but spent most of his time
hanging around with the
homeless and other low-lifes
or criticizing Pig for being
such a--well--such a PIG.
One day in a fit of
righteous indignation, Pig turned
on Coyote and squealed, "If you're
so smart, why aren't you rich?"
Just then a little zipper went
down Coyote's abdomen, and Jesus
stepped out. "Forgive me,
Pig, for I know not what
I am doing," said Jesus.
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Any Pennies?
Big blue blobs kept splattering
down around Badger, but he
paid them no mind and tried
to conduct business as usual.
It wasn't really the blobs that
Badger found distracting--so
much as a nut-case chicken
who stood flapping her wings
in the middle of the market place
every day, screaming something
like "The thigh is sprawling."--or
"the plywood walling." One day the
chicken stopped Badger and tried
to tell him her name and her story,
but she didn't get past her name
when he said, "O.k, here are
some pennies. Don't spend them
all in one place." Then, dodging
blobs, he returned to
business as usual.
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