SHEEP, LIES, AND AUDIO TAPE
© Greg Keeler 1991

WD-40 Polka

Have your bolts frozen up and gotten stuck on your nuts?
Are your hinges all rusted and brown?
Do you swear and perspire when you change a flat tire
'Cause the lug nuts are stuck all around?
Well, don't worry my friend. With this petroleum blend,
Your troubles will all be drowned.
Yes, just whip out that WD-40,
And hose that sucker down.

All you truckers and waitresses, here is a tip
For those truck-stop rendezvous.
You might smell like you've died, but you just can't decide
What deodorant to use.
Well, I've got a breath spray, perfume and cologne,
Rolled up in one aerosol can.
Yes, just whip out that WD-40
For the perfect one-night stand.

You can silence a gate or enhance fishing bait
With this handy, dandy spray.
Fix the swing on your porch, or devise a blow torch,
And melt all your troubles away.
It won't make a mess, and it smells like success
When it's at your finger tips.
Yes just whip out that WD-40,
And fetch me those vice-grips.